Misson accomplished!

Observation made by an 8th grader: Your room looks like an Elementary school classroom.


(remember: I teach grade 5 and am on the Elementary floor of the school)

Christmas Carols from the DSM-IV

1) Schizophrenia---- Do You Hear What I Hear, the Voices, the Voices?
2) Amnesia-- I Don't Remember If I'll be Home for Christmas (I'm not sure where home is??)
3) Narcissistic-- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
4) Manic-- Deck The Halls And Walls And House And Lawn And Streets And Stores And Office And Town And Cars And Buses And Trucks And Trees And Fire Hydrants And----
5) Multiple Personality Disorder----We Three Queens Disoriented Are
6) Paranoid---Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Us
7) Borderline Personality Disorder--- You Better Watch Out, You Better not Shout, I'm Gonna Cry, and I'll not Tell You Why
8) Full Personality Disorder--- Thoughts of Roasting You On an Open Fire
9) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells
10) Agoraphobia---I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
11) Senile Dementia---Walking In a Winter Wonderland Miles from My House in My Slippers and Robe
12) Oppositional Defiant Disorder---I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
13) Social Anxiety Disorder---Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

and the last one (for Monica) (=

14) Attention Deficit Disorder--We Wish You......Hey Look!! It's Snowing!.............HEY IT IS!!!!! ;)

We can work together!

AIM conversation debating whether or not a study group is in order:

Student 1: I think I have a pretty good handle on things
Student 1: it would help me to hash everything out
Student 1: if that meant TRYING to explain it
Student 2: good for you
Student 2: explain it to my cat
Student 2: while i read the study guide

You may use a calculator and a pair of dice.

Student: I notice on this practice exam there are no tax calculations. Are tax calculations fair game on the exam?

Prof: Everything’s fair game. The good news is there is multiple choice. So if you see numbers and you don’t want to deal with them, what does it cost, right?

Heh.

Tax prof: I'm not trying to make you experts on (the estate tax). If we can get the bare bones--excuse my pun...

Ho ho ho!

Tax prof (re: convincing a rich client to give his kids a bunch of money because of the favorable tax consequences): I don't know that (the kids) knew that I was sort of Santa Claus.

In support of euthanasia...?

Tax prof (re: the estate tax's being done away with but then resurrected): Remember the story about bumpin' off your grandmother (before 2010).

I'm not even going to touch that.

Prof, explaining why the IRS expressly denies deductions for contributions of used stuff of minimal value: You laugh, but we’ve had Presidents give away used socks and underwear and claim large charitable deductions, because it’s Presidential socks and underwear.

Happy Birthday to one of our own.

Happy Birthday Melanie!! She is more than likely being a good student and studying for finals right now.

Melanie is the one who resurrected my blog when I was forced to delete it under dubious circumstances which I shall not go into here...

How studying for Fed Tax makes me feel

My Magic-8 Ball concurs.

Student [in the role of defense counsel]: I would ask for a [Rule] 5(k)(1) motion [which, for you who care, would inform the sentencing judge that the defendant gave substantial assistance during the investigation]..

Prof: Student [in role of prosecutor], are you going to give the defendant a 5(k)(1) for his help?

Student: Ummm… No.

Prof: That’s a fairly arbitrary exercise of discretion there.

Somebody give that contract a blanket!

From Commissioner v. Ferrer, Judge Friendly:

“Attempts to do this [frame a definition] in terms of the degree of clothing adorning the contract cannot explain all the cases, however helpful they me in deciding some…; it would be hard to think of a contract more ‘naked’ than a debenture…”

Why are these words taking up space in my book?

From Federal Income Taxation, p. 727:

“The fact that there are a host of recent cases revolving around self-employment tax due on insurance termination payments suggests, correctly, that the self-employment tax generates considerable litigation.”

Tax reform, anyone?

From Nonprofit Organizations, p. 785:

“If this discussion of public support leaves you hopelessly confused, do not feel alone. The U.S. Tax Court stated that these rules are ‘almost frighteningly complex and technical.’”

Don't mess with lawyers!

Prof (re: getting the attention of a person whom a client was trying to sue): But after I threatened to take his house and put his family out on the street, he started taking my calls. After that I was busy for a week or two and I wouldn't take his calls--let him sweat a little bit.

Does Al Gore know about this?

Sifting through legislative history for a bill passed in 1988 I came across this gem:

"States routinely exchange information with each other for unemployment purposes through an arrangement sometimes referred to as "INTERNET."

Has it really been that long?

I hate Blogger bugs

:-(

Sorry, folks. Not sure what's causing the problems...

This is not the kind of question law students like to answer either.

From An Invitation to Family Law, in an evaluation of alimony policy:

"This is not the kind of question law professors like to ask because answering it would require them to do degrading things like empirical research."

[Originally posted by Becca. Reposted by Monica to try to fix techie bugs.]

Heh Heh

At least the authors have a sense of humor.

Tax textbook (p. 17-3): "[T]he estate tax is reincarnated for transfers by death after 2010."

Get it? Death? Reincarnation? Ha ha.